I honestly don’t know if I care anymore,
If I care bout anything.

What people think.
If I am up to your standards.
Nothing seems to matter.

What is there to lose?
Really.
What is there to lose?

Absolutely nothing.

Take every opportunity you have because everything could change so drastically in the blink of an eye and you don’t want to be fucked wondering ‘what if…?’

Wouldn’t that suck?
To know you could have had something or someone and not because what? You were too scared? There is no good reason to say no.

Don’t pass up things.
Good things will come to you if you let them.
But if you sit there and hate the world and live in your own pity nothing will seem good.

You have to let yourself be happy.
You can’t just feel sorry for yourself and be shy.
You have to get out there and learn to love yourself.
Because nothing is unreachable.

I’m being a complete hypocrite by writing this.

I’m still not where I would like to be.
But I am getting better.
I am learning that I’m going to fuck up and I’m going to make mistakes.
No one expects me to be perfect except myself.

I need to learn that not everything is going to be perfect.
Some things will be hard and tough to get through.
But I will get through them.
I will not let myself get so bad that I end every thing.
I wont.
I promise myself that.
I need to know that there are people who love me.
And that killing myself would be a huge mistake.
And I need to know that I need to at least try to help myself.
Try to help myself get better because its not gonna happen by itself.

And one day, I will love myself.
I will be okay with myself.
I will make mistakes and not punish myself for them.
I will learn that even if something doesn’t happen the way it’s planned that it will be ok and I will be fine and I will get through it.
It’s not the end of the world.
And it will get better.